Day 3 of Lent

Why is it that after stating my decision to give up swearing for these forty days of Lent that everyone on the road is cutting in front of me, just to challenge me I’m sure, as well as the grocery line has been the absolute longest it has ever been when I’m in a hurry. Where are all these people coming from? And what about my UPS package that was supposed to be here today? What happened to that, huh?

An interesting observation about myself is that before something has happened I’m already onto the next thing in my mind. Is sacrificing something during these days of Lent to bring me back to the present time and space? Is it a disruption in my daily routine so that I begin to notice things around me? Or are these forty days of Lent about giving me those AHA! moments so that I can be grateful more often?

I’ve also learned that Lent is actually 46 days, but no one really talks about that. Have you pulled out a calendar lately and counted the days, well I have. And sure enough, it’s 46 days from Ash Wednesday to Easter Sunday. The Catholic Church says that the seventh day or Sunday is a day of rest. What does that mean exactly? Does that mean I get to swear every Sunday? Or am I supposed to take those additional days and learn from them? I’m sure there is a lesson in here somewhere.

The other thing I have asked myself is that in stopping to swear, does that also mean I can’t even think the swear words or write them down? Is that the same thing? So far in the last three days I have slipped several times verbally but the hardest part has been to control my thoughts. This journey has made me notice that these words come with a lot of judgment about others. You certainly are never saying anything nice about someone or something when you are swearing. So I have begun to notice the negativity that surrounds these words and my mind; which is a pretty funny thing for me because I consider myself a positive person. Imagine what I am missing out on.

AHA moment, as I clean up my mouth I am also cleaning and clearing up my mind. Who would have guessed? How is your journey coming?

My Lenten Journey

Yesterday I realized it was the beginning of Lent for us Catholics. I took a break to put some thought into what I was willing to give up or sacrifice for the next forty days. HMMMM!!! I really like all of my vices so it was a tough decision.

After deliberating over martinis, chocolate, nail biting or swearing; I finally decided upon giving up swearing. Not sure I made the right decision but I’m going to stick with it. Now comes the forty days of Lent…which made me wonder where my quick tongue come from? This immediately put a smile on my face….

Growing up in a small town in Maine where my father was the town doctor and my mother a stay at home wife, one would never guess that my mothers favorite saying was “God damn it” but in a kind and gentle way if you can imagine that. My mom was a great lady with a unique sense of humor always with a cigarette in hand.

At the young age of 73 she suffered a heart attack, yes from all the smoking, but the reason I smiled when thinking of giving up swearing for forty days was the view of my mother in her hospital bed moments before she died.

In the hospital with no hope of survival my sisters, brother, spouses and grandchildren were surrounding my mother’s bed. The nurse (a male) came in to tell us that our mother was not going to recover. Now she was awake during all this but on morphine so not really sure what she gleaned, anyway…the nurse told us that as her heart slowed down and eventually stop that her feet would die first. I of course had never experienced anything like this before so my heart skipped a beat as we all listened intently. He went on to mention that after her feet lost their pulse her legs would be next and eventually her heart would stop. As death came upon her legs they would begin to cramp as the circulation stopped, he went on to say that our mother would want us to rub her legs but that she would not be able to feel our hands, for some reason it made me rub harder just in case he was wrong.

The only thing he could do to comfort her at that point would be to administer more morphine until finally she would simply close her eyes. So as her legs began to cramp and our rubbing was of no comfort we called out to the nurse to help alleviate the pain. I remember watching him walk in the room and reach down to her ankle to take a pulse. He looked at all of us and said “the end is near, her feet are dead.”

We all swallowed deep and kept reminiscing over funny family stories; the nurse in the meantime walked around to the head of the bed and said “Marie, how are you feeling?” Her response was “Joe, how would you feel if I reached down and grabbed your balls and twisted the hell out of them? That’s how I feel, now fix it!” The nurse had no idea what to say at this point but nod and administer the drugs; we on the other hand erupted into laughter as we watched our mother gently close her eyes for the last time turning our laughter into tears.

So as I decide to try my hand at giving up swearing for forty days, I must do so by first thinking of my mother and asking for her to watch over me for this time putting new words in my mouth and new thoughts in my head.

I miss you Mom, forty days here I come….what are you willing to sacrifice to become a better person?

Bigger, better, more in 2010

What would your life look like if you couldn’t use any excuses?
-Wayne Dyer

A vision board or treasure map is a perfect way to keep you on track for what it is that you say you want. It is a visual map of who your mind’s eye sees you as, it’s your secret self made visual so that you can emotionally connect with who and what it is that you believe you can do or have. The great thing about creating a vision board or treasure map is that it can not be criticized as it is your dreams and aspirations; however it is difficult at times to get other people’s opinions out of our minds. So I just want you to think for a moment about that. What would you do, be or have if money and other people’s opinions were not an issue. What gift would you bring to world? What would your life look like?

What if as you crossed the threshold of the doorway you did so as though it were the very first time? What if you could strip yourself of the past and the future? So that right now, right here you were present like the first day of school.

Who are you without your past, what stories-good-bad or ugly can you let go of, to just BE who it is you say you are or who it is you aspire to BE. Who are you without your past, without having to justify your dreams and ambitions? How would you describe that person? I like to look at myself from the top down, like having an out of body experience. Describe yourself from that vantage point as if you had already achieved everything you wanted to.

Dr. Maxwell Maltz, the author of Psycho-Cybernetics wrote “the human mind can not tell the difference between what is real and what is vividly imaged” that is what you will be creating in this vision board workshop. Join me on February 19th in Phoenix, Arizona as I challenge you to become bigger, better, more…contact me for more details. Let’s build a better universe on vision at a time.